I was reminded this morning of a wonderful poem by Julia Alvarez called, “Why I Write.” The poem, in her collection, The Woman I Kept to Myself, begins:
“Unless I write things down I never know
what I think, no less feel, about the world.”
For many of us this poem speaks to the connection between self and perception and writing.
Since school just started, I also found myself thinking about experiences with writing in school.
The writing voice can easily be lost when criticized by others, but may also be found through support and encouragement.
I recall one of the first stories I ever wrote that I was quite pleased with. I was in second grade, and the story was about a puppy. Since I didn’t have a puppy, I was impressed with my own imagination, and the idea that I could write something that was from my imagination. Do you remember latching onto that kind of discovery, like a life-line? At any rate, the story, complete with illustration, was put on the classroom wall for parent- teacher night, and sent home to receive acclaim, and so I thought, at the age of 7, “I’m a writer!”
Fast forward to high school. I wrote an essay, I forget the exact assignment, but it was about an afternoon at my grandfather’s farm, riding around on the truck, feeling free and happy almost in spite of myself and my teenage pre-occupations.
I am sure the writing was not particularly good, although I certainly tried. The emotional experience was what I was trying to convey, that’s what was important to me. I remember writing a phrase along the lines of, “the cows eyed us with curiosity” which I thought gave the scene an interesting perspective. My teacher did not. She wrote back sarcastically that she doubted the cows were ever the least bit curious. Perhaps she was right, although how she would know more about what cows experience than I remains unclear. But to this day I remember that squelched feeling, that sense that the point of what I had written was missed entirely by my reader.
It is such a small criticism to remember all these years, isn’t it? But there you go, our new artist skins are thin, and even slight discouragement can rip a small tear. This is not to suggest that wise, critical comments be replaced by empty praise, which can be equally discouraging.
Finding your authentic voice extends far beyond writing of course. Authenticity is one expression of courage. It ‘s not easy to be authentic in our culture, especially past a certain age. There are so many messages we hear that repeatedly cause us to shut off, turn down, walk away from parts of ourselves. Some of the messages are well-meaning in intent, to get us to learn to get along with others with less conflict. I suspect a lot of us over-learn these well- intentioned guidelines, to the detriment of authentic expression, and as these guidelines become habitual, we lose sight of what we really think and feel. This is true in the upbringing of both genders, by the way.
But some of the messages are not well-intentioned and come to us with the clear intent of trying to, well, shut us up, literally and figuratively. Messages that say we won’t be accepted if we do or don’t do things a certain way, or want certain things or don’t want certain things. Some people even stop trying to figure out what they think or want, the effort is just too great, or too risky or uncomfortable.
For some of us, finding the way back to who we really are, can begin in writing. Writing can lead us to know ourselves, and to speak with more authenticity, to trust our intuition, to be more compassionate and to allow ourselves to be known. And the more we are willing to be known, to ourselves and to others, the more authentic our writing voice will be.
As background information, I want to take a quick detour to tell you about some exciting and enormously helpful research from positive psychologists Chris Peterson, Martin Seligman and others. In an extensive search of world religions, wisdom literature, cultures and traditions, these researchers have identified 6 universal core human virtues. These are Wisdom, Transcendence, Humanity, Courage, Justice, Temperance. To define these universal virtues, the researchers further have identified 24 character strengths, all of which can be developed, nurtured and learned. Creativity and curiosity, two of the main themes of this show, are connected with the core virtue of Wisdom and Knowledge. Strengths associated with Courage, the third theme of this show, are bravery, persistence, integrity or authenticity, and vitality.
So today we focus on authenticity. It isn’t easy and it is not without risk. Let’s talk about what it doesn’t mean. Being authentic doesn’t mean forgetting the fundamental social contracts and has nothing in particular to do with doing as we please. Authenticity means that publicly and privately we accurately represent ourselves, what we think and feel, our intentions, our commitments. It means we value and take responsibility for our behaviors and feelings, we step up to the plate about mistakes, we treat others with respect and care, we have a certain reliable consistency in the face we present to others, which reflects our inner being.
Gandi wrote "One really has nothing in the world to fear. One becomes fearless when one understands the power of the soul."
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